(If WordPress weren’t mostly so great, I’d be saying “Fuck WordPress” right about now - it just ate this post when I pressed the “Publish” button…now to remember what I had said. Mutter.)

I have decided to post at least once a day for the month of August. As it turns out, there’s at least one person who reads my blog. And wants me to write more often. Here’s to you, sarasaur. I know I’ve missed the first few days, but that’s where the irony is. Had I not been out of town (and with unstable internet connection - are you listening Howard Johnson?! I’m talking to you! “High Speed Wireless Internet”, you said. You should, instead, say, “An Obese Eight Year Old With Sticky Cotton Candy Fingers Could Draw Your Requested Website With Crayons Faster Than You Can Download It On Our Connection Wireless Internet.” Can you feel that heat? Yeah? That’s because I BURNED you, bitch), I would never have been goaded (inspired) to write more. What’re you gonna do? Need a spoon when all you have is a knife, that’s what. And then use that knife to slit your wrists, when all you have are ankles. Or something like that.

Ground rules.

1. I have to actually write something. I can’t repost (at least without commentary). I can’t simply give you a link or a quote, I have to use my brain.

2. I have to post at least once a day. I can post more than once in a day, but it won’t count toward future days (this is not “30 posts in 30 days”). Exception: I will be posting Monday’s and today’s posts today; Tuesday’s and Friday’s on Friday; Wednesday and Saturday’s on Saturday. The rest of the month will be normal. Follow?

3. I reserve the right to pull a Calvinball and add more rules as I go. Man, I love being in charge. ;-)

And we’re off.